Five Times Socks Ruined Tony Stark's Day
by buzzlikebee19
Summary: Five different situations where wearing socks made life difficult for Tony Stark


Title: The Five Times Socks Ruined Tony Stark's Day

Author: Buzzlikebee19

Pairing: Tony/Pepper

Warning: Mild sharing of carnal knowledge

Rating: Strong T

Disclaimer: I don't own any part of Iron Man or the characters. Oh, but if I did….

Summary: Five times in Tony Stark's life where wearing socks was detrimental to his health (and his dignity)

A/N: This is my first completed Iron Man fic and I'm so proud of myself! Now that I've gotten this one out of the way, I can wrangle all the other Iron Man stories that have been running wild in my mind. _(Also, this was supposed to be a 5 +1 but I could not think of a +1 for the life of me)_

"Tony?" Pepper Potts asked as she walked into the uncharacteristically dark mansion after her lunch break. When she left him, he was in the workshop. She would assume he was still there, but the whole house was eerily quiet. "He's up to something," she thought to herself, placing her purse on the counter and walking into the main room. "Tony, are you in here?" She called out again. She opened her mouth to call JARVIS, but before she could, a familiar piano riff suddenly and noisily came over the loud speakers. On the second riff, a spotlight popped on in the middle of the room, and Pepper knew what (and who) was coming next. Hearing Tony's excited giggle and his feet running from the adjacent room confirmed her suspicions. When the drum kick hit, and Bob Seger started singing, Tony Stark himself, (clad only in a pink shirt, white socks and underwear) came sliding into, and right out of the room. Pepper felt like she was watching in slow motion as her boss slid sideways, across the floor of the main room and into the living room couch. He then flipped over it feet first, one foot sending a stack of documents flying off the coffee table as the rest of him landed on the floor. Pepper was cackling with atypical laughter, using the counter for support as the papers silently fluttered to the floor. "You're not even going to ask me if I'm okay!" "Are…you…o…okay?" she tried to ask through her giggles. "NO!" Tony yelled back, which only served to make her laugh more. "JARVIS, please tell me you recorded that!" Affirmative, Ms. Potts," the AI replied. "I've taken the liberty of sending it to your email as well." "That's it," said Tony, angrily getting up. "JARVIS, I'm reprogramming you, and Pepper, you're fired until further notice." As he stomped down the steps, JARVIS piped up, "In Ms. Potts defense sir, it was rather humorous." "SHUT UP!" Tony retorted, and Pepper heard the workshop door close forcefully even through her laughter.

All was quiet in the room, save for the gentle but persistent squeak of bedsprings and the occasional sound of pleasure from the couple inside. The sun was halfway through setting, bathing the occupants of the room, (and subsequently the bed) in an ethereal orange glow. As their passions rose, so did their voices. "Oh Tony, yes, yes, right there…" Pepper moaned as he picked up his rhythm, increasing her pleasure. "Pepper, so…good," he murmured, shifting his hands from her waist to her freckle-dusted shoulders. His pace became more erratic and Pepper shifted her hips to meet his movements with hers, but it only seemed to move him incrementally further away from her. "Pep-Pepper, wait-" he ground out, pressing his sweat slick palms into her shoulders. "Tony," she breathed out, leaning up to capture his lips in a kiss. "Pepper, I'm gonna-" "Yes Tony, please," she replied, picking up her own rhythm. "No Pep, I'm-shit!" He yelled as he lost his balance and disappeared entirely off the bed and landed with a muted thump on the hardwood floor. Silence filled the room for a moment that felt like forever. Finally, Pepper cautioned to lean over the bed and assess the full extent of the damage. Toy was laying on the floor, breathing heavily, a hand over his face, the other still clutching the bed sheet which he hastily tried to grab to prevent him from falling. Pepper noticed without managing to stifle a smile that while the sheet had managed to cover Tony's lower half, the semblance of dignity was shattered by the prominent tent his manhood was creating. She rolled back to the bed before speaking. Taking a deep breath she asked, "Are you okay?" somewhat querulously, trying not to reveal her hilarity. "I was slipping. That's what I was trying to say." "Oh...well-well then…." Pepper stammered, holding her breath, wracking her brain for something serious she could think of to stop the wave of giggles she was holding in from breaking forth. "It's these damn socks," Tony said angrily after a moment. That did it. "Oh my God Tony…" She near whispered, before turning and burying her face into a pillow, screaming in silent laughter. "Pepper? What's wrong?" He asked, getting up and peering at her. "Are you okay?" His only response was her nodding her head vigorously into the pillow, and waving her hand at him. "Are you sure? Wait. Are you-are you laughing?" He demanded, squinting at her. "No, no…" she tried to say, but it came out as a laugh. She ventured to look at Tony, who instantly had the most scandalized look on his face that she had ever seen. "Well I never!" He all but shouted, whipping the sheet around him like a toga and stalking out of the room.

They were running late, again. "Tony, come on!" Pepper yelled up the stairs, angry that her boss would be the cause of another missed flight time. It wouldn't be so bad if she hadn't explicitly told him (at least seven times) how the head of the Tokyo steel company Stark Industries was trying to invest in did not like to be kept waiting. "Tony!" she yelled again, moving from the couch to the foyer to wait for him. "Almost done, Pep!" He shouted from the hall upstairs. Running down the steps he called "Have you seen my-fuuuuck!" The whole thing happened before she could fully process it. He lost his footing, sliding down the steps, his behind catching every one on the way down. Pepper blinked, taking in his prone form, pants in hand, looking for all the world like Beaker after an experiment gone wrong. He looked at her, as if asking what had just happened. That was it for her. "I'll be in the car," she said quickly, gathering up her things and attempting to walk away as nonchalantly as she could, slamming the door behind her. That didn't stop Tony from hearing her shouts of laughter, however. He didn't speak to her again until they touched down.

He was doing it again. 'Though I should be used to it by now,' Pepper remarked to herself as she watched her man-child of a boss from her position on the living room couch. Currently, said boss had hit a wall in developing a new part of the suit, and was dragging his feet in circles on the new Persian rug. Rather than engage him, which would inevitably halt the progress she was making on her emails, Pepper opted instead to sigh impatiently, and send a disapproving glance his way. "Did you say something Pep?" "No Tony, I did not," she replied, not bothering to look up from her laptop. He shrugged and continued to make carpet circles. Before long his attention was caught by the hair sticking up on the side of his arm. He looked over at his personal assistant who was still ignoring him and doing whatever it was she did while he was working. The idea seized him before he had time to think of the ways it would backfire. Rubbing his feet wildly back and forth on the carpet ('thank God for thick socks') the billionaire quickly put his plan of attack in motion. First he glanced over at Pepper to make sure she was still in 'Completely Ignore Tony' mode. She was. Next he nonchalantly started making his way over to where she was seated on the couch (still dragging his feet for maximum static build up). When he had completed his short journey, he leaned over to give her the impression that he was reading her email, while reaching one hand towards her elbow. The next three things happened in quick succession. Pepper looked up to ask him just exactly what he thought he was doing, Tony's fingers made contact with her elbow, and he shouted as the shock that was meant for Pepper went straight to his RT, giving him enough extra volts to send him backwards on his ass, and knock him out in the process. "Oh my God, Tony!" Pepper shouted, moving her laptop quickly to kneel down and check his pulse. When she felt his heartbeat against her fingers, she asked, "JARVIS? Is Tony okay?" "Yes Miss Potts. Mr. Stark's vital signs are stable in the aftermath of the unforeseen electrical anomaly. He has merely been rendered temporarily unconscious. The system estimates that he will regain consciousness in approximately ninety minutes." "Really?" She said more to herself than to the A.I. "Maybe now I'll be able to get some work done." "Affirmative. The system indicates your progress will increase by 87% from the time that Mr. Stark first came upstairs." "Really," Pepper replied, amused by the candid manner JARVIS relayed the information. "Thanks JARVIS. I think we can leave Mr. Stark to his nap then." "Indubitably." An hour and a half later, Tony woke up under a blanket in the living room, with no clue of how he got there. He sat up and took in his surroundings. He was in the living room, and Pepper was in her usual spot, typing away on her laptop. She must have given him the blanket. She was good for that kind of thing. Pepper looked over at him. "Did you have a good nap Mr. Stark?" "I think so Miss Potts, but could you possibly tell me how I ended up on the floor here?" "I'm sure I don't know Mr. Stark." "Um…okay. I'm gonna go back to the workshop now." "You do that Mr. Stark." Tony did, but glancing at Pepper, he could tell by the smirk on her face that there was something she wasn't telling him.

Pepper should have known something was up when she heard a crash from the workshop. But she tried to ignore it and get back to working on next month's schedule. Or tentative schedule, she tried to remind herself. With Tony you never knew what would upset even the most carefully laid plans. She made it through two more days before she heard another crash. "JARVIS, what's going on?" She asked the A.I., reluctant to investigate for herself just yet. That morning, Tony had informed her that he would be working on suit modifications all day. From the way he inhaled the coffee she gave him, Pepper could tell that was what he had been doing for most of the night as well. "Miss Potts I believe Mr. Stark is in some kind of struggle against Dummy. He may need your assistance." Pepper quickly removed herself from the couch and hustled down the steps to the workshop. She quickly punched her key code in and when the door opened the first thing she heard was Tony yelling in what sounded like fear. "Stop, Dummy! No, stop it! Go the other way! Stop!" "Tony, are you o…okay, what is going on here?" Tony was hanging upside down, his right foot in the boot of his iron man suit, which was held aloft by Dummy's claw. Said robot was shaking the billionaire up and down, in an entirely backwards attempt to get him out of the boot. "Pepper! Turn him-stop! Help me turn him off!" "How did this happen!" She yelled back, stepping away quickly as a particularly strong swing almost sent Tony hurtling into her." "My sock-is stuck-intheboot!" He yelled back in a rush. "You have to-push his-emergency…shut off! I can't-reach it like this!" "Uhh, okay!" she called back, crouching down to maneuver herself around her bosses swinging limbs and to the back of Dummy's control panel. "Stop swinging your arms!" "Oh yeah cause I haven't been trying that! Why don't- you tell me something else obvious!" Making up her mind to just army crawl over to the robot, she called back "Maybe you don't need my help then, Mr. _Snark_!" "No! No I'm sorry Pep! Please-help me-before my lunch-makes a Jackson-Pollock of the workshop!" Pepper finished her journey to Dummy's backside, and using her nail, popped open the control panel. She quickly pressed the Big Red Button and turned just in time to see the semi-sentient robot's claw release Tony and send him soaring across the room into the workshop couch. Which was lucky for him, since he could have landed in many more dangerous, sharper places. Before she had time to ask if he was alright, the inventor got up, and tried to walk over to her. He made it about one step before his dizziness caught up with him, and he collapsed onto the floor, grabbing the couch for support. "Tony!" Pepper yelled as she ran over to him. "Are you going to be okay? Do you need anything?" "Yes…I need you…to stop asking so many questions…" He looked up at her and smiled, his eyes still barely focused. "Well, then," she said, getting up and kicking his still booted foot, "have fun getting out of that thing manually." She stalked off and he called after her, "Aww Pepper no, I was kidding, come back!" Tony laughed, sliding himself onto the couch and breathing deeply. He didn't want her to go, but he loooooved to watch her walk away.


End file.
